Tag Archives | rules

NFL To Replace Coin Toss With Rock, Paper, Scissors

NEW YORK, NY (CAP News) – “We’ve known for a long time that flipping a coin in the air was an absurd way to determine who gets the ball in a sport where they spend the remaining 60 minutes giving each other brain injuries,” said NFL Commissioner Roger Goodell. “We think this new rule removes the element of chance and restores football to a 100% game of skill.”

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September 1, 2011 · Read full story · Comments { 0 }

Zombies No Longer Required To Extend Arms Out In Front

AMSTERDAM (The Skunk) — Paul Bernsauer, President of the International Alliance of Zombies and Swamp Monsters told reporters that his memberships had been complaining for centuries about the now-abandoned practice.

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September 1, 2011 · Read full story · Comments { 0 }
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